Being A Parent Is Hard

 

I'm sure you've all heard the saying "it takes a village".  Totally true!  We can't do this alone!  If nothing else (moms especially), need the support of other moms... Those who are where we are... Those who have been there, done that.  Mentors, Peers, FRIENDS!  

My kids are no angels, but they are FAR from being heathens and I'd like to think that overall they try to be good and have good hearts!  We're trying really hard to instill certain traits into our children (responsibility, accountability, trust); this is really hard when other adults don't help us with that :-(

A got in trouble at church today. Why? For hitting another little kid.  The teacher pulled him out of class and brought him to us (we were volunteering across the hall).  My first thought was "would she have called us our of service for this?  Or was he only taken out of class because we were close at hand?"  

Anyway, Chris took him aside and this is what transpired:
Chris:  A, what happened?
A: He hit me (points at chest).  For those that don't know him, this is a BIG deal!  A has never been a talker, but we're trying super hard to get him to use his words.
Chris:  Then what happened?
A: I hit him in the pace (face)! (Points to cheek).  At this point he's hanging his head and acting REALLY remorseful.
Discussion about how it's not ok to hit ensues, etc. We also tell him that he needs to apologize to the teacher for disrupting Sunday School and to the little kid.

Now I think we handled it ok... I mean, he's 3!  Right?

I saw the teacher in the hall later and relayed what A had told us (on his own, mind you!  There was NO prompting on our part.).  Response?  "That's not what happened, I saw A hit him".  Ummm, ok? It's not possible that you missed the first part? I mean, they're 3!  A has never just hit someone without a 'reason' (stole a toy, pushed, hit, etc.).  His story seems completely logical to me.  Why, at 3, would he make that up?  And why, as a Sunday School teacher to 3 year olds, wouldn't you at least humor the fact that the 3 year old is saying he was hit first?  To say I was frustrated would be an understatement.

I felt so bad for A!  Not that he knows or understands what transpired but I do!  I know that my child was being called a liar and I know that his story was being dismissed as irrelevant.  

We need people to believe us and our kids.  I couldn't imagine telling A, at 3, that he was lying and that's not what happened.  Wouldn't that just teach him not to tell the truth because it wouldn't be believed?  Or not to trust those that are in charge because they're never wrong?  My heart hurts for him and I'm deeply saddened because this was someone I looked up to and thought of as a mentor.  For her to be so dismissive of what I was telling her hurt!  

I realize as kids grow up, they're bound to lie, make up stories, bend the truth, etc.  But I'd like to believe at 3 that's just not really in their nature yet.  Am I wrong?  

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